What this year thought me. #1

(photo from tumblr)

12/8/2015

The past few years especially this year was though for me. In any sort of problems I have encountered I was always scared to faced it and I would always run from it. I describe those years as a labyrinth. The question was always how would I get out through this maze- through these series of uneventful happenings that made my life felt miserable.

Last night I broke down and for once I cried myself to sleep. Crying rarely happens to me within the past months. I was used to the pain but never the kind of pain I felt yesterday. It was the kind of pain that didn't only hurt mentally but you can feel the heaviness and emptiness not only in the chest but your entire being as well.

But then, I realize all of it. I realize the reason why these series of events are happening to me. These trials would make me stronger.  These are my key towards being a better version of myself. And I shouldn't just put the idea in my head but apply it in reality.

I may not be the girl everyone thought I was. I may never show who or what I am as person on the outside. But I realize that there are billions of people in this world. And in the whole entire universe I am just a stardust that wouldn't be noticed. That is why it is important that I should focus and give attention to myself because that's one of the reason why I am standing here and still living- It's one of the reasons what life is about. It doesn't matter who or what kind of person you are but life is about doing and achieving those that are destined for you. Those that you desire and those that would also seek for you.